Most of my guest posts here are of a more whimsical nature. It is not because I can't be serious, but because I usually save the serious, introspective stuff for my own blog. Sometimes it is worth going the other direction. Sometimes The Muqata brings the deeper thoughts out of me.
I had lunch with a very dear friend today. We have known each other for close to 25 years. That is long enough to watch each other grow up into the men we are today: fathers, husbands, professionals etc. Our conversation went down the natural path about what we are doing, how the families are and all of the standard small talk. And then we bounced around a few what if questions.
His what if question to me was what would have happened if I had made the move to Israel. He wanted to know if I ever thought about it. The answer is simple...Yes. I have considered it a million times. It is the itch that I have never scratched. A question that forever remains unanswered.
Had I gone to Israel as planned I can guess how very different life would be. If my heart rings true I would have gone all the way. I would have made aliyah in my early twenties. I would have shared in the triumph, the glory and the failure from within and not from a distance. Most likely I would have done my time in the army. I might have seen combat or maybe not.
It is hard to say what line of work I'd be in now. Would I be some anglo expat working for a technology company or would it be something else. Maybe I would have opened up a bar or restaurant that would be so very Israeli and at the same time so very American.
Then again, I try not to spend too much time in the fantasy of what if. I truly cannot conceive of a life without my children. Had I gone they wouldn't be who they are. Perhaps I never would have gotten married. Who knows.
Now I still think about making aliyah. I still think about the opportunities and wonder if it is a pipe dream or just a future life experience. It is not just me anymore. There are so many other people and so many variables to consider.
I wonder.
Wherever I am, my blog turns towards Eretz Yisrael
"What-ifs" are lousy games to play. Better to play "What-next".
ReplyDeleteSome people who make Aliyah at the wrong time find it very difficult to make ends meet or move forward with their lives as they seem to have missed the point (and opportunity) in their life where one gets established and grounded.
Other people reach the point (at any age) where Aliyah is the ideal next step for them and yet they miss the boat entirely - for so many wrong reasons.
"'What-ifs' are lousy games to play. Better to play 'What-next'."
ReplyDeleteVery good point, Joe.
-- MAOZ
Right. I mean, with something like "I truly cannot conceive of a life without my children. Had I gone they wouldn't be who they are" one can conceivably (like that pun?) think that your kids could have been not only different but better, or worse. In any case, we who are here don't mind others getting on board.
ReplyDelete"What-ifs" are lousy games to play. Better to play "What-next".
ReplyDeleteI agree.
Right. I mean, with something like "I truly cannot conceive of a life without my children. Had I gone they wouldn't be who they are" one can conceivably (like that pun?) think that your kids could have been not only different but better, or worse.
Absolutely. I don't disagree. The point is that I try not to waste time and energy moaning over what I could or should have done.