Rafi G. from Life in Israel has an excellent post up, a translation of a YNET article which satrically contrasts the difference between different Jewish groups in Israel.
Following is a snippit. See the rest on his blog here.
Secular Israeli child speaking with his father...
Dad, in the encyclopedia it says it was because the Maccabees did not want to eat pork.
And for that there was such a war?
See, pork has a ton of cholesterol. Maybe the Maccabees were into a health thing.
and for that there was a war?
These Maccabees could be very extremist.
Why did the Greeks make them eat pork?
Because the religious make a big deal out of everything.
The Maccabees were religious?
No way. The religious people do not go to the army.
So how did they defeat the Greeks?
God helped them
But you told me there is no God?
I do not understand - there is or is not?
There is not but they thought there is.
I do not understand.
Is there a God?
Ask your mother.
Every time you do not know something you send me to mother!
I know important things. If there is a God is not important.
It says Judah Maccabee defeated the Greeks at Bet Horon.
If that is what it says, that is what it says.
Where is Bet Choron?
Far away. Not in Israel. In America.
Dad, Columbus discovered America only in 1492!
You are a nudnik. It is in the Occupied Territories.
The Maccabees were Settlers?
I know that. Maybe go play with Sean?
Religious child speaking to his father...
So Judah Maccabee was secular or a non-Jew?
God forbid. Why would he be a secular or non-Jew?
only seculars and non-Jews go to the army!
there was a time when even the religious went to the army.
Why did the Maccabees go to the army and we do not?
Today the Torah protects us.
Then the Torah did not protect them?
Maybe go with Moishi and learn some Mishnayos!
Did the Maccabees learn Mishnayos?
They learned Torah. A lot of Torah.
They did not work?
Wherever I am, my blog turns towards Eretz Yisrael