I spent plenty of time in Albuquerque (it was thankfully far less memorable than Manila), and the following is one of the funnier moments I had there.
Big Albuquerque Southwesterner (with a cowboy hat) comes over to me in a book store in Albuquerque.
him: Hey boy, I betchya that you're from Israel, arentchya?Not to be outdone, I called up a Kosher restaurant on the East Coast to send me some sandwiches packed in dry ice as there was hardly anything kosher to eat in Albuquerque.
me: Why sir, you're absolutely correct! How could you ascertain that I'm from Israel?
him: I can tell you're from Israel cause of that thing on yer head. (as he points to my kippa)
me: Well, I'm glad you were able to identify my nationality, we're proud of it.
him: Ya know, you Israelees must have one heck of an education system.
me: Our school's aren't that bad, how did you arrive at such a conclusion?
him: Because you speak better English than I do!
I asked the guy at the deli over the phone if they ship sandwiches and he proudly answered, "We ship everywhere in the United States".It took me about 15 minutes to convince him....
"Great", I answered, "Can you please ship the order to my hotel in Albuquerque, New Mexico?"
He paused, and replied, "Didn't you just hear me? We only ship in the United States. We don't ship to Mexico."
I stammered back, "But New Mexico is IN the United States, its one of the 50 States".
He replied back full of self confidence, "I don't care if its Old Mexico or New Mexico, we don't ship to Mexico since we don't ship outside the good old USA."
I asked if I could speak to the manager.
He replied, "I AM the manager!"
Wherever I am, my blog turns towards Eretz Yisrael טובה הארץ מאד מאד